Rants and raves of an aging doctor

After 6 years of absence, I accidentally rediscovered that I, have a blog. I spent the night going through my previous entries, and more than half of it I couldn't remember writing. It was actually like reading someone else's blog.

The last entry I said just 2 more days and I'm done with clerkship. Wow. A lot has happened. I've finished clerkship, finished internship, graduated from medschool, passed the boards, went into OB-GYN residency, and finished 4 years of it.

Wow. When you put it like that, you wonder where all those years went. And yeah, I've broken up with my boyfriend after 10 years. We haven't seen each other for 2 years already. Oh well. Some things aren't meant to be I guess.

So I've been officially unemployed for 24 days. Been spending my days staying up late, waking up late, watching TV the whole day, taking breaks to eat meals three times a day and take a bath. The first few days I loved it. Having all the time to myself. Not having to wake up early, force myself to tolerate a very cold shower, then go to the hospital everyday and not go home every three days and wait for the next baby to be born. But then, after some time (in my case, after 2 weeks), I just suddenly missed that routine. A routine which provides me money monthly by the way..

My hands are itching to operate. I miss my SS patients. I miss the walls of the DR. Now I have to start all over again, by myself. With no schedule, no chairman or training officers to tell me what to do, no deadlines to meet. It's all up to me now. And I understand what my consultants have been telling me before: "Mami-miss mo yan pag-graduate mo." "Mahirap magsimula." "Akala nila pag doktor ka na at graduate ka na madaling kumita ng pera." Oh my gosh. So so true.

Now I'm trying to find stints so I could earn money while I'm waiting for exams in July. I mean, being 30 years old, a graduate of Medicine, and still totally dependent on my father is not easy. You just feel kind of guilty that your parents have spent a fortune on you so you can "reach for your stars". And then while you're doing residency you still depend on them because what you earn isn't really enough. And then after another graduation and a little extra letters after your name, you still have to depend on them until you figure out how to start your career for real. I mean, they should be retired by now, for Pete's sake. Okay, maybe not retired. But not really working as in, working hard for you. Right? My other friends have given their parents stuff like La-z-boys and holiday trips and executive check-up packages. The most expensive gift I've given my tatay was a 3-thousand peso camera which, I won during a raffle.

I suck. Big time.

Okay. That's not really my goal to shower my father with lucrative gifts and what-not. I just want to be not dependent on him anymore when it comes to expenses, and be able to provide for him instead. Give back. People always say "Naintindihan nya yun", "Pagdating ng araw sya naman ang tiba-tiba". People don't really understand how we feel and I can't blame them. But just believe us when we say, the situation we are in is hard. :(

Add to that, being single. Haha. I just really want to have my own family.. Hopefully before the cutoff for advanced maternal age. They say there's always someone for everyone.

If you're out there, what's taking you so long? Hahaha.

Oh well. That's it. As if there's somebody out there who will read this. I have to go back now to my throne in front of the TV. I love Discovery channel.

Nerd and proud.

Ciao.

clerk no more

almost.

only two days left.

so near yet so far.. ahhh..

Two's

Two more duties to go and we're done with East Ave rotation! wee!!

Two months into clerkship and so far, this is what I still want.

I've delivered two babies already. Loved it. :) Do I still want to be an Ob-Gyn someday? I dunno. Let's see what I'll want when I'm done with clerkship.

I have two thousand pesos left out of my savings.

Just a little more than two weeks before Bryan and I celebrate our 5th anniversary. :)

In two hours I'm going to sleep already.

Hope to post again regularly. I've too many stories to tell, and yet don't know where to start.

Maybe next time.

Enjoy the last few days of summer everyone! :)

white shoes

Wear them and be toasted alive.





Three more days before we enter the snake pit.

God help us.

pasko na naman

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Happy Christmas everyone!!!

...and thanks to all those who greeted me a Happy Birthday. :)

I'm turning 23 in a few hours.. Eek.

I would've made a postcard type of greeting, but my laptop was reformatted and I haven't re-installed Photoshop yet. Hehe. La lang. Just wanted to mention. Oh never mind. Nonsense.

Peace! :)

23-to-be

Christmas is fast approaching! Woohoo. I'm already turning 23.

Ahhhh I'm out of money. Eeek. Went to Megamall with Dimple and Donnie last Wednesday, bought gifts. For exchange gifts, and gifts for my family. I haven't bought gifts for my friends yet. Hayyy. We saw Aiko Melendez there and her controversial fiance. Hehe.

Then we went to hear mass because it was the feast of the Immaculate Conception. Then decided to go to Gateway after with Nicky, Mitzi, Helen and Dimple. We celebrated in advance my 23rd birthday at Burgoo. Grabe sarap! Yummy yum yum. We were given a free set of chicken wings appetizer. I ordered Taco Mexicano pizza, Grilled Chicken Americana, Cheesy Beef Macaroni and Shrimp and Ribs Platter. I ate a lot!!! Loved the food! :) We were really full. Then later the servers approached our table and sang a birthday song to me and gave me vanilla ice cream with a little pink candle. Haha. I'm gonna miss times like this when we're already clerks. :(

Anyways, I hope I still get enough money to buy gifts for my inaanaks, and my friends, and others. And I still have my dues in school! Whaaa!!! Oh well. Christmas without spending is impossible. Hehehe.

Happy birthday to me!

post-DWTL entry

Congratulations to Helen for being chosen as the Rectress for the next Days with the Lord batch. :) You really really deserve it. Galeng! Hay I wish I'd stayed. But I had to go home. Homesick. Argh. Can you believe that? After 7 school years of staying in the city during weekdays, I still get homesick?

Anyways, just had to post that. I'm still searching my butt off for journals about Steven-Johnson Syndrome. I'm sooo tired already...

Less than a month to go before Christmas!!! Yehey!!

hello November

Wahahaha. I'm really getting to be a delinquent blogger. Not that I write meaningful entries, because I don't, but still this is a blog and it needs entries to nourish it.

Let's see...

I'm finally free from my "impacto" wisdom teeth, but half of my chin is still numb. Yeah yeah. Nerve injury. Still waiting for it to regenerate and hopefully start talking again without half of my lower lip lagging..

Back to school. We're done with the case conference after much tension. And now we're up for a journal presentation. Jeez. Will it ever end?

On a happy note, my semestral grades were all okay. I passed Pedia! Wooohoo!!! I literally was hopping my way out of Dr. Caja's room after getting that grade. Dr. Caja really must've thought I was nuts. Oh well...

I'm friends with my former bf. We're cool.

My laptop's cured of its viruses! Yay. But I lost all my games... Good thing there's still Super Mario.

I ate too much today. Huhuhu. What can I do? There were lots of food: Pansit, beef potroast, sugpo, chicken adobo. I feel like my stomach's given up on trying to push the food through to my intestines..

My cousin's gone through a lap cholecystectomy, and she's great now. Thank God.

And now, my grandfather's sick, his pancreas has nodules, so it has blocked the passageway for bile, leading to inflammation of his gallbladder. They're not advising surgery anymore, because his condition's a mess. He's already 74, he is hypertensive and diabetic. The doctor told them that he can go into hemorrhagic pancreatitis anytime. He's now regretful about his alcoholic intake before. He just stopped about a month ago, when he was diagnosed with cholecystitis. And then a CT scan revealed nodules in his pancreas. Now he refuses to go to the doctor, telling that it would kill him faster to know what his real illness is. Haaay. Let's hope for a miracle.

I customized my friendster profile. I wanted to make it look like my layout in this blog. I'm surprised it was much easier to customize it because there are drop-down boxes and you just have to choose the colors. Unlike this where I had to figure out the codes.

I watched Harry Potter last yesterday with Dimple. Absent kami. Hahaha! Not knowing the book has its perks too sometimes. You don't get disappointed with missing scenes because you don't know there were missing scenes at all. :) But I loved that movie. The effects were really awesome. By the way, we were at Gateway mall 3x just this week. Heehee. Nice coz the fx fare's just 10 pesos.

My new favorite: Breadtalk's Hot Chic. Yummy yum yum.

Christmas is getting near!!!! Wahoo! I'm turning 23... Is it just me who oftentimes forgets my own age? Seriously. When people ask me how old I am, I actually get confused if I'm 23 or 22... Grabe it's getting really cold na..

Clerkship's also getting near (assuming I pass 3rd year). Ay grabe katakot...

Pero I'm happy lapit na Pasko!!! Weeee!!!